I’m going to be writing today about another topic that inspires me, our unconscious selves. Our energy bodies. Our world that we create every day with our intentions and beliefs.
This topic might not be the most popular among the logical techie crowd, but I feel that there’s a resurgence in ancient science around the world, with the likes of Burning Man tech entrepreneurs micro-dosing LSD or shrooms for inspired creativity.
As someone that has grown up around the Cape Town trance festival scene can attest, there is a larger evolution at play in the world today. No longer are people taking psychedelics substances simply because they want to have a good time, but because the they want to expand their state of mind to reach new heights of self-realisation.
This is where my interest in metaphysics and global consciousness arose from. We are now enjoying a new awakening with global communication and limitless information but lack the deep wisdom and guidance.
With these tools at our fingertips, lack of wisdom can easily manifest as criticism of others, and create lasting impact without a second’s thought.
Recently I left a comment on a YouTube video of a trance artist that I enjoyed, Avalon.
My comment states:
“I love this set so much I named my daughter Avalon!”
I wrote this with the intention of simply sharing my appreciation of this artist’s music, and that in fact, my daughter’s name is Avalon. I thought it to be a light-hearted comment full of mirth, and even received a “heart” from Avalon himself. My comment also made the top comment on the page, which I enjoyed.
However, this brought about a troll of the internet, as all good things eventually do.
Someone by the name of Diego Gallardo replied:
“Avalon Carswell? Poor girl.”
Now I know that Avalon isn’t a usual name, and when my partner and I decided on it, we knew that not everyone would be for it, but the consensus we received was that it was a beautiful name.
However, this single comment from a stranger completely threw me. I questioned whether it was even a good name at all. I questioned whether I had sentenced my daughter to a life of confusion and misery at having such a different name. It hurt to think that someone could be so blatantly disrespectful, for absolutely no reason.
It stirred my anger that some people would judge before knowing anything about anyone.
I wasn’t sure what to reply but felt that I should just leave it at that, trying to convince myself that it was a comment not worth replying to, and that the internet will shame and mock him to my defense. It didn’t.
It just so happened that the week after this occurred, I had decided to pick up my meditation practice again. I used the “Quiet Mind” meditation timer app as I meditated in my home office with select crystals for 15 minutes before getting ready for work. My goal was to keep a good streak going every day for as long as possible.
During one of these meditation sessions, I started to think about who I was, and what my purpose was on this planet (not for the first time, but long neglected!). I started thinking about my higher self, and my true identity and how I should be honouring myself more with these kinds of spiritual practices. As I pursued this thought deeper, I just let the mantras flow out of me as I progressed along my mala prayer beads.
One mantra stuck for me: “I am the light bringer”. I had never thought myself as a light bringer before, but during this meditation my mind clung to it like it was an important message for myself. I wasn’t even sure what a light bringer was to be honest.
Later that morning on the bus I opened my “Emerald Tablets of Thoth” app that I had on my phone and randomly chose a chapter. It mentioned that Thoth was the Sun of the Light and he encouraged the children of men to dispel darkness with Light wherever we go.
I reflected on this for quite a while and thought about how we could bring more light in our daily lives. How could we lighten other’s darkness’s? Sure, there’s charity, there’s kindness, there’s positivity, but I wondered where I could immediately make an impact. I’m also kind of a shy person, so I’m not going to just go up to someone and say, “have a great day!” even though this might truly make their day.
I wondered about the energy I had been emitting recently with the people that I encountered on the streets of Auckland and noticed that I hadn’t had the most positive thoughts about people. I often caught myself judging others in my mind’s eye about all sorts of things without ever having met anyone. I’m not quite sure where I picked up this habit, but it certainly was a habit by this point.
I decided on the bus that I would secretly bless those that I came across on my walk to the office. I would silently say “bless you daughter” or “bless you son” and give them a second of thought as I closed my eyes. Nobody notices me on the street anyways (or at least avoids eye contact), so I thought it a perfect opportunity to create some positive energy for the people I encounter every day.
I continued doing this on my way to work and back, and after only 2 days also noticed that something had changed in my perception of others at the office. I felt that they were more inviting, and more engaged with me even though they probably haven’t changed their behaviour themselves. This new perception purely came from within me. I became more receptive to their energy, and more engaged, bringing more of my own energy into conversations and interactions.
Over the next week I witnessed feelings of isolation starting to dissipate, I found myself actively asking how others were doing, actively being of service to others, and increasingly interested in other’s well-being. Nobody had changed their attitude or behaviour to me (at least, none that I could tell), but I just felt so much more engaged.
The only differences I was making were:
· I was meditating 15 minutes every morning
· I was secretly blessing others without them knowing as I passed them on the street
After a week of “blessed walks”, I was looking for some music to play, and happened upon that amazing Avalon mix again (it truly is amazing!). I saw my comment, and I saw that his reply was collapsed - just waiting to be clicked on. I was torn between re-opening negativity again and just ignoring it. Seconds later I found myself opening his reply and felt the wave of frustration rise again within me.
I decided to do something about it, but from a place of positivity. I felt myself in a better place at that moment and knew that the words that came from my keyboard would be respecting my inner truth.
I replied with:
“@Diego Gallardo Not quite sure why you would write that bro... I'm just here to enjoy the music. Bless you son. ”
Done. Done. Done.
After days of ignoring the troll, I finally bit the bait and replied. I knew I had lost (one should never feed the trolls), but I felt that I had replied in a positive manner, and that would be the end of it.
The next day he replied with what I believe to be history in the making! He replied and apologized for his comment - on YouTube! I had never seen this before, and I knew that YouTube comment sections were some of the most toxic places on the internet (besides a game of DOTA or LoL of course).
“@Christopher Carswell Man! Sorry, it was not my intention to offend you! It was a joke, I was just imagining a girl named Avalon Carswell (I don't even know if Avalon is actually a name, maybe it is and that's where i got it wrong) and thought it was funny, maybe my humor was a little bit dry. If I have offended you, I apologize! I'm here to enjoy the music too man, cheers! Have a good day.”
Incredible! I have such renewed respect for this man, to apologize in public like this must not have been easy. I thought more about his comment and realised that him possibly being Spanish speaking, it might not have occurred to him that Avalon could be a name. I know from my time in Buenos Aires that Spanish cultures only has a certain list of names that can be officially registered for children, and that you certainly wouldn’t normally have a name like Avalon.
Of course, I have forgiven him with this slight, and would even be interested in knowing more about this guy. You would too if someone apologised to you on a YouTube comment section – the unlikeliest of places.
By giving myself the time and space to actively work on my practice I was able to response in kindness, where otherwise I would have responded negatively.
“Energy flows where attention goes” – Huna Principle (Makia)
If we project love and peace with our blessings every day, we are contributing to this world’s vibration in intangible ways. With our practices, come our fruits.
Just as we work each day to bring the fruits of prosperity into our bank accounts, we must also work on ourselves to bring the fruits of the intangible in our lives.